Better Not Younger is my expression of the moment.
When I think about the years passing and what it means to each of us I sincerely hope my focus is on improvement, enjoyment and wisdom rather than the re-creation of the past. There is no reason why the future cannot be bigger and brighter than what has gone before; that is how I want to spend the next decades and where I want my focus to be.
I cannot miraculously become younger and yet I can most decidedly be “better“.
The thought of ageing is frightening in many respects but it would be even more daunting if my goals were impossible to achieve. Those who strive to be “younger” rather than “better” are in for disappointment in a big way. From what I see, it doesn’t work.
There is something age has taught me and that is to “be in the moment”.
So many moments in life pass us by through lack of attention, through timing, through stress or overwork and through ignorance. I know I have wasted precious “moments” in the past and it is only now with a deeper level of maturity I can see what a mistake this was.
I cannot catch the lost moments but I can make up for lost time.
Every day can be remarkable and it is for us to grab hold of those moments, live them and memorise them. We cannot foresee how many there will be, our crystal ball is not so clever, but it is not how many we make but the quality of those we live.
Living in the moment is a blessing of maturity.
When we are younger we are certain moments last forever; we toss them away like confetti, so puffed up with the magnificence and certainty of our youth. If I could convince my children of anything it would be to learn to gather the moments and live in them.
Many of the truly wonderful moments in our lives are small but that is why they are easy to escape, to be dismissed and ignored in our quest for greatness. We know to pay attention to the big, our minds, hearts and bodies are conditioned for those; but the small, they can be slippery.
Growing up means I want to grasp every moment, to savour it and to remember. I want to reflect on yesterday today and bring into my mind the small giggles, the smiles and the happiness I felt. Small moments but I am in them. For this way I not only stayed in the present but also I held onto something for my future.
In the moment means exactly that.
I don’t want to be thinking of the other when I am “in the moment”. Is there anything more frustrating than spending time with someone who isn’t in “your” moment? Those people who give of their physical presence and yet their mental state is far away are not “in the moment’. I call that going through the motions and I call that, missing out.
The practicalities of growing older are not always remarkable but knowing how to be “in the moment” is one of the advantages. In this case better means we do know better.
Life is too precious to miss out. xv
images loulou de la falaise and yves saint laurent, pierre boulat
cover, ali mahdavi