illustration – paper fashion
On the Road
Once you are on the road… after the satellite navigation is working, the maps are opened and the directions duly noted… all that remains is to understand the French way of driving. The French own the roads, maybe those from Belgium vie for the title a little but the French, they are the clear winners on the roads.
The French take on a different persona behind the wheel. The relaxed man or woman opens the car door, plants their derriere on the seat, engages the clutch and as the ignition turns and the gears shift their personalities go through a transformation. These are not the relaxed and patient, I-have-all-the-time-in-the-world personas that I see every day chatting away in the pharmacies, the banks or the boulangeries… as if time is irrelevant.
No matter how long the queue behind them… the conversation about their health, the sharing of their personal life or the crustiness of their baguette will be told. Behind the wheel these drivers are not the same punters who spend an hour or two everyday enjoying their lunch… behind the wheel the French mean business.
When Driving In Provence
Don’t be intimidated… It is well to remember that you are entitled to fifty percent of the road. Most of the roads that aren’t on the autoroute are narrow… most of the French drivers take the middle route… it pays to stand your ground some of the time or you will spend a large part of your holiday in reverse… Think of a it like a game of bluff…
Driving on the other side of the road… is not easy, if it’s not your natural side… a little like ‘your side of the bed’… it’s hard to change and requires much more concentration than normal. I move between left hand drive and right hand drive every month so I have one little reminder that keeps me where I am meant to be. I know that the steering wheel must always be in the middle of the road… so in those moments that I am slightly disorientated, I mentally concentrate on that.
Don’t rush the roundabouts… Provence is roundabout kingdom… every small village, town or city is full of them. Traffic lights are not de-rigeur in Provence. I love a roundabout because they give me time if my sense of direction is lacking. I suggest to friends when they visit that if they are not sure of which exit to take, to keep going around and around until they are. Taking the wrong exit, because you feel stressed to make a decision, is the worst decision… it can only go downhill after that. There is no shame in deliberating and besides it’s only fair that we amuse the locals a little.
Road signs in Provence are easy and as a region I think it is very well sign posted. If you have a general idea of where the major towns are and in which direction you are heading then, even if you get lost, the signs will generally point you in the right way. When entering a village or smaller town always follow the sign that says centre ville… this will inevitably lead you to where you want to be and a place to park your car. In the big cities and towns, the one panel that has saved me countless times and enabled me to get on the right road home is toutes directions… all directions. When in doubt take this one as it always leads to an interchange where you will be able to find the right route for your destination. Sometimes it may not feel like it is the correct sign to follow… but it is. Leaving towns and cities can be hard work and knowing this will save you a lot of heartache… and arguments with your co-pilot…
Autoroute driving is the fastest way from point to point and I recommend using it. It is a romantic idea to meander the back roads but I prefer to go off the beaten track when I am in the vicinity of my destination, not as a way to get from A to B. Don’t think I am suggesting not to explore… it is by far the best way to see a country… but France is large and so is Provence… and there is much to see… Choose your routes carefully. The autoroute is fast and that can be daunting, so stick in the right hand lane until you find your comfort zone. Drivers on the autoroute are intolerant of slow cars that hog the fast lane… I mean really intolerant!
The roads in France are magnificently maintained and in top condition but you must pay to use the autoroute… cash or a credit card work… so have them ready. It is a two fold system called the péage… the first stop is to collect a ticket and the second is to exit and pay. Symbols overhead alert you to the cash or the credit card paying lane… Try not to get that wrong… I have, much to the annoyance of the ‘racing car’ drivers behind me and believe me when I say… backing out is the ultimate humiliation…
Car parking… I learnt to park… really park… in Provence. The car parks are small and the spaces really tight….. so tight, that the passengers need to climb out first… If you hire a people mover be very careful about the head hight of the vehicle… car parks are also low and don’t automatically accommodate all vehicles… Yes, I have managed to jam the car into a car park that is too low for my vehicle… all in all one of life’s most embarrassing moments… So a word of caution… read the height restrictions before you barrel in… exiting is not pretty..
We stop for pedestrians and are cautious at pedestrian crossings… it’s not quite the same in Provence. It is every man for himself, so don’t take offence if you are blasted for being courteous to those on foot… Remember every Frenchman behind the wheel is in a hurry…
Filling up the car in Provence… sans plomb… unleaded… gazole… diesel… Getting petrol on the weekend can be difficult because the stations are self serve and credit card only. This isn’t a hardship… the problem is that the bowsers only take French credit cards… no foreign cc’s and no cash… If you need to buy petrol on a weekend the autoroute is the best option and the larger ones are the most likely to be manned. If you do end up in this situation it is not uncommon to offer a French driver the cash for the use of his or her credit card… Strange, but that’s how it works…
Happy driving… and watch out for those speed cameras and gendarmes… they are in hiding… xv
