What is my “word” for this year?
Every year at the start I choose a word to act as a prompt for something I wish to achieve, aspire to, remember or simply bring to my life. There have been a variety of words since I started and I would say my success rate in managing to uphold their meaning is break even. Last year, my word was balance. As the year rolled out what a word it turned out to be. When I struck “balance” as my goal of the year I was focused on strength, flexibility and movement as it transpired I worked on balance in other areas of my life. The yoga poses didn’t improve as I wanted but my work/life balance did thanks to forced time at home with periods of lockdown. The year that was 2020, forced me to reflect and act within new and restricted boundaries. I had taken for granted so many aspects of my life – many lacking in any balance – and realigning those has made for some changed ideas and practices. So what about this year, 2021? It’s a hard start here in Europe so I struggled to find my one word this year. I’m going with a broader definition; one to ramble around as I find my way. It’s “expectation”. This is my go-to this year. Our minds have been through a washing cycle or twenty this past year; what we understand has been thrashed, bashed and turned endlessly. My expectations have changed on a daily basis and with that has come periods of confusion and lack of understanding. This year I need to manage these expectations – to find a place of equilibrium – where change and disappointment can roll off my back seamlessly. To acknowledge, understand and accept is my blueprint when un-sort for change comes knocking. An expectation is wonderful when it contains the right kind of surprises; when the opposite is true, management is essential. At the same time as I want to moderate my expectations, I also need to build them up. Has this past year given us cause to question everything and expect the worst? I’m afraid so but that’s because looking back with hindsight can be unforgiving. Should we, could we have done much differently? Most probably but that’s a long lost luxury. Expectations require management, not blanket enthusiasm or negativity and a little bit of my “balance” I learned last year. I don’t ever want to be pessimistic or a half-empty glass type, never, but a dose of realism won’t hurt. Disappointment is probably one of the worse feelings and we all had our fair share last year. I’m over that and want only to focus on what I can do. I’m delighting in where I am and whom I’m with rather than lamenting what I am missing. Of course, it’s a game and one to require ramrod discipline but I’m trying. Looking at sunny holiday destinations and what once was is not helping. My reality is now and it looks a particular way; I can run with that, adjust my expectation or find myself miserable. I have chosen to work with what I’ve got. Most days its ok – not every day – but I’m winning. This year I’m shaking up my expectations. I am expecting more from myself, yet I am realistic about the changes facing our world. Life isn’t like it was but it is pretty ok all the same. That’s my expectation. xv
I need to work every which way around this idea.
I’m not taking the joy out of expectation simply adding a little reality check.
A more fluid view of expectation can avoid disappointment.
